Monday, December 28, 2009

Bow And Arrow Balloon Old Game

Celestial Light

I could not just leave well enough alone.

They lead me down the hallway. Mint-green. I know that I am sick, but the walls here make me feel like it too. They take me to a door, one of many, at least 10 in this corridor alone. The tall man with the patient smile and the clean, white clothes unlocks it. He has a whole lot of keys there. I smile at the bright colours but only shortly because the green reminds me of my problems. I wasn't even aware I had problems until this morning.
Behind the door is a white room. I smile again. White, not sickly-green, and such a radiant white, at that. "What a pleasant colour-scheme.", I remark. The tall man smiles at me like I tend to smile at my mother. She is a bit confused. Old age tends to do that to you, I guess. I hope she isn't worrying too much. The tall man also nods and replies: "We renovated the whole wing just three weeks ago. Please don't make us do that all over again." He laughs. I laugh. "Don't worry. I like white.", I say. He gives me a pat on my back and leaves the room. "Dinner at 7. Don't forget it.", he says before closing th door behind him.
I feel welcome here. Smiling I sit down on the white bed and look at the white walls. Such a pure white... I have no window but a neon-lamp provides white light. It's so nice. So nice.

Three days later and I'm worried. The doctor said I seem to be doing ok so far, but we'd have to see how it develops over time. I haven't told him about the white. I prefer the green in the corridors now. But I'm not allowed to sleep in the corridors, so I'm confined to my room at night. I don't dare to switch off the lights, because in the darkness, the void looms. So I sit in my bed and stare at the walls, the obscenely white walls.
I fell prey to one of the oldest fallacies known to man. I saw the white as the opposite of black, the opposite of the void must be good, right? False. Lies. Fallacy.
Your enemy's enemy is, after all just your enemy's enemy. Nothing more, nothing less. And the white burns the remnants of my sanity.

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